Ode to Ted Nugent - Parody of "Cat Scratch Fever"

I know their maybe dumber, but I'm as dumb as they come

I misquote history!

I'll tell people they should serve, even though I never would

Oh yeah, Hy-poc-risy

CHORUS

I'm a Fox News receiver
Fox News receiver

I don't do any research, I just believe what I'm told

Reading for me would be a chore!

And I don't like homosexuals, I think they're impure

and Pat Robertson is my mentor!!

I'm a Fox News Receiver
Fox News Receiver

If you look in my head, you might not find a brain

From Actuality, I estrange!

Like most my music, I am pretty lame

bullshit, I'm buyin', buyin'

I'm bullshit fed!!

I'm a Fox News Receiver
Fox News Receiver

My favorite moments of the "Attitude Era"

Bored and uninspired, I proposed an open invitation on facebook the other day for someone, anyone to give me a topic to blog about. I only received one response, and what a topic it was for them to give me.

They asked me to write about my top 10 favorite moments of WWE's "Attitude Era."

This isn't an easy topic for me, because frankly I didn't like the "Attitude Era."  The person who asked me to write about it knows I didn't like the "Attitude Era."  Matter of fact, the "Attitude Era" is what turned me off from professional wrestling. What made me go from the had to watch it every time it was on, every magazine bought had to be pro wrestling, every video rented had to be pro wrestling fan, to the fan who didn't care if he missed an episode or not.

I hate Vince Russo in so many ways. I can think of a million ideas of his that I loathe with great passion and only a handful that I liked. Only one that I truly appreciate.

10 huh? Well let's see what I can do.....

My favorite Moments of the "Attitude Era" 

November of 1997 to May of 2002.

#10 - The Formation of the Acolytes Protection Agency

Sometimes the problem with a wrestler's career is that he hasn't found a character that fits him. A character that he can embrace and truly become.  I think that was the case for Ron Simmons in the WWE for years. The ridiculous gladiator gimmick, with the blue helmet for sure didn't suit him. He's also never been strong on promos, and making him the leader as well as the mouth piece of the Nation of Domination, often left him looking obligated and uncomfortable in the position.  When WWE decided to team him up with Bradshaw as the Acolytes I found myself feeling that for once maybe Simmons was in a position that fit him.  When they took it a step further and became the APA (Acolytes Protection Agency) I knew Simmons was in a role that fit him.  This is definitely something I appreciated about the "Attitude Era."

#9 - Stone Cold Steve Austin defeats Shawn Michaels for the WWE championship @ Wrestlemania XIV

It's no secret to anyone that knows me well, that I'm not a fan of Shawn Michaels. Or better put, I'm not a fan of the real life Michael Hickenbottom.  I appreciate and praise the worker that he was in the ring, but who he was outside of it, I have little time or respect for.  I consider this to be one of my favorite matches during the "Attitude Era" because it marks one of the only times Shawn actually did a favor for someone.  From his second intercontinental championship win, to this match, I can't think of a time other than to his best friend Diesel where Shawn did the job.  Didn't drop the IC title clean, had to have a tournament where Razor won.  Didn't drop the IC title clean, pretended that he was too hurt from getting beat up, forfeited it to Dean Douglas.  Wouldn't drop the Tag titles to anyone, had to have a tournament that 1-2-3 Kid and Bob Holly won.  To listen to Shawn go on about how Bret wasn't being professional because he didn't want to drop the title to him at Survivor Series 1997, has to be the most hypocritical statement ever said.  To know that Michaels wasn't going to drop the title to Austin until Undertaker made it clear to him that he was, even further justifies my feelings.  Watching Shawn take the stunner, followed by a 1-2-3 made it clear that he was out and Stone Cold Steve Austin was in.  Most certainly give that "Attitude Era" moment a huge thumbs up.

#8 - The Introduction of Gangrel 

Being a creative writer and actor (or at least lover of theatre) it should come as no surprise that I embrace the character over the idea of everybody using real names and appearing to be everyday John Doe's.  An evil Vampire gimmick to me was pretty cool.  I actually wish that they had kept him solo and built him stronger than what they did.  Awesome look, awesome finisher and furthermore about the coolest entrance music next to Val Venis's.

#7 - Rob Van Dam gets his shot at the WWE 

I read about this guy in various professional wrestling magazines and saw clips of him here and there on the internet for years.  Then I saw full matches of him in ECW, and all I could think was that this guy could be the next big thing in the WWE if ever given the chance.  When he finally arrived in WWE, I found myself for the first time in a long time making sure I put aside my Monday Nights to see "Mr. Monday Night" himself.  While his career didn't quite skyrocket the way I envisioned it to, I still found his time in WWE to be very enjoyable.

#6 - Michael Hayes makes over the Hardy Boyz

For years Matt and Jeff Hardy were nothing more than jobbers that would consistently do favors for various wrestlers in both singles and tag team matches.  They appeared weak, push overs that didn't propose a threat to anyone, anywhere.  When Michael Hayes made it a priority to go in and coach them, give them a little attitude and teach them how to wrestle, I bought into it. I found the vignettes of him training Matt and Jeff to relate to how a high school football or wrestling coach would train his athletes. I found it even more intriguing the way others doubted Hayes and what he could do with the Hardy's and how he silenced everyone when they came out and had their first major victory.   It saddens me that everyone remembers the Hardy Boyz with Lita, and only a handful even recall their short stint with Hayes as their manager, but it was most certainly one of my favorite moments of the "Attitude Era."

#5 - Too Cool 

Fun, exciting, entertaining.  I loved Too Cool.  When I knew they would eventually be on TV, I would consistently skip back to RAW to make sure that I never missed their matches. Found them to always be a joy to watch.

#4 - Ken Shamrock wins the 1998 King of The Ring 

While I still thoroughly enjoyed the WWE tag team division during the "Attitude Era", I found myself finding it hard to follow and get behind many of the singles stars. The only one I found entertaining without being repulsive, was Ken Shamrock. When it came to actual wrestling in the ring, actual technique, offensive maneuvers and counters, I don't know if there was a better wrestler in the WWE at that time than Ken Shamrock. I felt that he was being overlooked for a long period of time, and it felt good to know that he was finally given his due with a King of the Ring championship.  I will say that I feel the ceremony could have been a little bigger and a little longer.  He won and it was a simple, "Congrats, you're the King of the Ring...next match!"  They could have given him an award of some sort, like they had other King of the Rings year's previously.  Yet, he still won it and that was exciting.

#3 - Mick Foley getting to shine 

I'm a huge fan of Mick Foley, and I know his glory years were during WWE's "Attitude Era." The guy is one of the most entertaining wrestlers of all time and furthermore a great human being on top of it. I wish the WCW had appreciated him more and he could have had a better run over there too. Nevertheless of all things I feel the "Attitude Era" did wrong, giving him his due and making him out to be the superstar that he was, was one of the things they did right.

#2 - Chainsaw Charlie and Cactus Jack win the WWE Tag Team Titles @ Wrestlemania XIV

Considering how much the "Attitude Era" pushed the "In with New, Out with the Old" agenda and how disrespectful the movement seemed to be against older wrestlers it was rather ironic how Terry Funk's one and only WWE title reign happened when he was 54 years old. It was short lived as they'd drop the titles the very next night on RAW but it was rewarding to see the Funkster still kicking ass well beyond the geriatric age of 40.

#1 - The Light Heavyweight Division 

If there is any thanks that you'll ever hear me give Vince Russo with absolute sincerity it is his idea to incorporate and push light heavyweight wrestling during the "Attitude Era."  From Taka Michinoku, to Dean Malenko, to Essa Rios, to X-Pac, to Tajiri and Jerry Lynn I loved the matches that took place in WWE's Light Heavyweight division. A combination of high flying areal maneuvers with fast paced technical in the ring wrestling, always made for extremely entertaining action.  For years you either had to look like you spent 8 hours in the gym and another 8 pumping yourself full of steroids or you had to weigh 700 lbs for McMahon to want to put you on television.  Yet when the "Attitude Era" came to be, so did the idea that maybe guys under 6'0, who weighed less than 250 lbs could put asses into the seats just as easily as could those much taller and much bigger.  Some of the light heavyweight matches are my favorites of the "Attitude Era."