How I became The Amateur Wrestling Enthusiast I am Today.

Talking with another wrestling fan the other night, I was asked how and when I became the amateur wrestling enthusiast that I am.  Well, to answer that question I think it is a fairly simple, straight forward answer.

I started wrestling when I was 7 years old. Around this time I attended my first collegiate dual meet, which happened to be at the University of Iowa.  For the longest time, from about 1991-1999, I only followed Iowa wrestling.

Then in 1998, my Dad played slow-pitch softball with a guy by the name of Benjie Winegarden who had wrestled for Waldorf College and taken an 8th place All American finish at the NJCAA wrestling championships.  He was transferring to Iowa State University, where he was going to walk onto the team at 141 lbs.

The following season, I got to know Iowa State wrestling pretty well. Benjie got me signed t-shirts, posters and even brought me in to meet the team a couple of times. It was a very neat experience.

He then got my Dad and I tickets to the 1999 BIG 12 Championships.

It was a blast. We sat right down in front with a huge group of Cyclone fans.  There was so much good wrestling. My dad knew a few of the other wrestlers from other teams, like Dave Kjelgaard of Oklahoma, but other than that we only knew the Iowa State wrestlers.

I didn't like this. I wanted to know who these other kids from other schools were. And that's really when it all began.

I began studying the sport like crazy. Come 2000-2001 I wanted to know as much about Division I wrestling as I could.  And I've been like that ever since.

Winegarden unfortunately finished one match shy of Qualifying, taking 4th place.  I want to say he sat out the 1999-2000 season and then was beat out for the varsity position by Aaron Holker the eventual 2002 NCAA champion the following year.  Not 100% positive about that.

Anyway, I suppose it all began there.  And I have Winegarden to thank for making a College wrestling fan out of me.

Why Horror Often Fails

There are two truths about Horror films that cannot be disputed. They can be really good and they can be really bad. When done right a horror film can be a fun, exciting and rewarding experiences for its viewer. A film that combines the best elements of drama, action and suspense wrapped up into an intriguing thriller. Horror can be mesmerizing and captivating. It at times can even be the best cinema has to offer.

It can also be the worst cinema has to offer. When done wrong, horror films can be as bad as it gets. They can be an awful, miserable and even painful experience. Horror at times can SUCK.

If you give horror a fair shake, you'll most likely come across films that you love and ones that you hate, with a bunch of ones in between. As an avid fan of horror and furthermore a passionate, staunch defender of horror it isn't easy for me to admit this. The bad horror films far outnumber the good ones. It's easier to find ten horrible horror films than it is to find one good one. If you get on Netflix and search for one, you'll sift through dozens upon dozens of garbage before you run across a good one. It wasn't any different during the days of rentals either. If there were fifty movies to choose from in the horror section, chances are the bad ones outnumbered the good ones.

Why is this? Why are the really good horror movies hard to find? Why are the shitty ones a dime a dozen?

Why do so many horror movies fail?

I've given this a lot of thought. I realize that not everyone has the same views as I do but I also see a lot of similarities in the horror films that are popular and beloved verses the ones that people seem to loathe. I do believe that the horror films that fit nice and neat into the "suck" category usually have at least one of the, if not a combination of the, if not all of the problems listed below.

Uninteresting Protagonist(s)

One of the reasons so many horror films fail is because writers, directors and producers fail to realize that audiences need interesting protagonist as much as they do interesting antagonist. They make the fatal mistake of thinking that as long as the killer is interesting, then nothing else is needed.

Have you ever came across a dead animal in the road? How do you feel when you see a raccoon or a snake? How do you feel when you see a dog or a cat? Now you may be the exception, but most people are going to feel differently seeing a dead dog in the road than they are a dead raccoon. The reason why is because we as human beings have a connection with dogs. We see them as our pets. Our friends. For many of us, dogs are our family, beloved more than our human relatives. It hurts to see a dog the road because we make the connotation that someone somewhere loved that dog and someone somewhere is going to be heartbroken and depressed to learn about his/her passing. While the loss of life of the raccoon may also be sad to us, we don't care anywhere near as much about it as we do the dog, because we don't have an emotional investment in the raccoon.

Protagonist in horror films are no different. What makes scenes in a horror film frightening to us? What makes them thrilling? Why do we care about what happens? Or why do we not care?

Why when watching John Carpenter's HALLOWEEN for the first time were you on the edge of your seat when Michael Myers was after Laurie Strode? Why did the sense of urgency have you glued to the screen in anticipation of what would happen next? Yet when watching HALLOWEEN RESURRECTION with Michael Myers killing a bunch of random teenagers, you found yourself bored and apathetic to the fates they faced.  Why is that?

The answer is simple. Laurie Strode is a well written, compelling and interesting character. As was Dr. Sam Loomis. Those two characters, the protagonists of the film had every bit as much to do with why John Carpenter's HALLOWEEN was a success as did the antagonist Michael Myers.

You'll find this to be true with a lot of horror films. Chucky had Andy Barclay in CHILD'S PLAY. Freddy Kruger had Nancy in A NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET. If we invest in and care about these characters, then we have an emotional response to the danger they are in. We empathize with the situation and fear the consequences that could result.

Moustapha Akkad, producer of the original eight HALLOWEEN films, was once asked why he felt HALLOWEEN V: THE REVENGE OF MICHAEL MYERS was one of the most hated of the franchise. He said he felt it was because the character Rachel had been killed off early in the film. He's right. She was an interesting character, the heroine who helped Dr. Loomis to stop Michael Myers in the previous film. Killing her off and replacing her with Tina, who wasn't at all interesting, took the steam out of the story. Audiences were disappointed and frustrated.

Horror needs good protagonist(s) as much as it needs good antagonist(s). Jesus needs his Satan. Satan needs his Jesus. It's what makes the whole thing engaging.

SACRIFICING STORY FOR TWIST

A twist in a horror film can make it or break it. THE SIXTH SENSE had such a clever twist, that helped the film to be immensely successful that here we are nearly twenty years later and movies are still trying to capitalize on the idea by throwing twists into their films left and right. Only making a twist work is a very difficult task. Even M. Night Shyamalan, who wrote and directed THE SIXTH SENSE has failed in trying to duplicate the success of his 1999 smash hit.

Twists generally have one of two problems.

A - They are way too revealing and easy to figure out. You didn't even have to be looking for a clue in Shyamaln's THE VILLAGE to figure out the ending five minutes into the film. While it took a little longer, you'd have had to have been sleeping through THE HAPPENING to not know how it was going to end. Both film's might have been better and saved from criticism if they had concentrated on making their story stronger, than to have worried so much about trying to shock their audience with a twist.

B - The twist is nonsensical and doesn't make any sense. This seems like it should be common sense but unfortunately it isn't always. The twist in a film needs to add up and be plausible. Furthermore there should be hints along the course of the story, to where when the truth is revealed at the story's conclusion, audience members slap themselves in the head for not realizing it all along. There is nothing clever or neat or shocking about an ending that makes no sense. HIGH TENSION for example has a twist that fails in a multitude of ways. If you go back and watch the film, the revelation makes no sense. There is no way, given the evidence that the film provides that anyone could have logically came to that conclusion. A film's twist cannot contradict the story. If it does, even if the rest of the film works, the nonsensical ending will ruin the experience.


And there are other reasons horror movies fail. More so on the technical and budgetary end of things. Horror films are usually cheap in comparison to other films to produce. Therefore the directing, the writing and the acting may suffer. The cliched saying, "You get what you pay for" does sometimes ring true in the world of cinema.

Yet I've found, even with B films, films with an extremely low budget if they avoid the two cardinal mistakes I've defined above, they are in the very least watchable, if not at least on some level good.

Horror films both good and bad will continue to be made. I've sat through enough shit in the past couple of years with modern day horror films that I could stand to see some more good ones. Maybe one day I'll meet one of my dreams face to face and with me as the screenplay writer and Jason Janes at the director, we'll get to make our own horror film.

My Top 10 Least Favorite Sequels

10. Halloween H20

I like the movie. I OWN the movie. I watch the movie a lot. On the surface it may not make much sense why I would would have it on my "least favorite" sequel list. Looking at it strictly as a sequel to Halloween II, it holds up incredibly well. Yet it blatantly ignored Halloween 4, Halloween 5 and Halloween: The Curse of Michael Myers and this is where I have a problem with it. Yes Halloween 4 was mediocre at best, Halloween 5 is an atrocity of a film and Halloween: The Curse of Michael Myers is perhaps the greatest example of a film with incredible promise and potential that was ruined in execution by a dimwit director.

The fact of the matter is, Donald Pleasence aka Dr. Sam Loomis was a huge part of the Halloween series. And I feel that Halloween: H20 was a slap in the face to a man who had poured so much of himself into the series. Jamie Lee Curtis had been asked to be in other Halloween films in the past and she had always turned down the role, stating that she felt that her Halloween days were behind her and she had moved on to bigger and better things.  Donald Pleasence died in early February of 1995, and it was announced in December of 95 that there was going to be a new Halloween film and JLC would be returning. Suddenly her attitude was that Halloween made her a household name and she felt that she owed it to her fans to come back and do one last sequel.  That has always seemed very coincidental to me. The argument I hear a lot is that if Pleasence were still alive he would have been in H20, but I've never bought it. I do not think JLC would have been in a Halloween sequel, as long as she had to share the spotlight with Pleasence. The small tribute to Pleasence's famous monologue frin Halloween was better than nothing I suppose, but I still feel more could have been included. Donald Pleasence deserved a high prolific, positive send off and this is a reminder that he didn't get one.  And for JLC to say that she is glad she had nothing to do with the crappy "4-6" sequels that came after Halloween II,....news flash!! Halloween Ressurection that she did take part in was way worse than Halloween 4 and Halloween: The Curse of Michael Myers and only slightly more watchable than Halloween 5. 

9. Halloween III: Season of the Witch

It's really a shame that Halloween III: Season of the Witch is considered to be a sequel, because as a standalone film, it is actually pretty good. Take out the Halloween III part of the title and this film would easily be remembered as a solid 80's horror flick. Yet because it has Halloween III in the title, it is one of the most hated sequels in this modern history of film, let alone horror. Like everyone else who fell in love with the Michael Myers story of Halloween and Halloween II,  I was excited to see where the story was going to go next. Only Halloween III: Season of the Witch didn't have Michael Myers in it. It didn't even take place in Haddonfield, Illinois. It was a brand new story, with brand new characters and no one new what to make of it. It bombed at the box office and put John Carpenter into a bitter mood.

I can appreciate and understand what Carpenter was going for here. His goal was to make the Halloween series into an anthology series, where each year a new scary story would be released on or around Halloween with the title being Halloween (Subtitle).  It's a unique and interesting idea and it would have been interesting to have seen all the different films that would have been made and how long it would have lasted until it came to an end.

I feel Carpenter's main flaw in executing this idea was by having a direct follow up to Halloween that continued the Michael Myers story. I think if there was no Halloween II (which happens to be one of my favorite sequels of all time) that fans, including myself would have been more open and accepting of a new story.

Things were much different in the late 70's and early 80's than they are today, but I can't help but think Carpenter's vision would work in today's "information per second" age. If people were prepared and set up for an anthology series, I think it could work.  Nevertheless Halloween III: Season of the Witch is a good standalone film, and one of the worst sequels of all time....in my opinion.

8. Bride of Chucky

If you can't tell by now, continuity is a huge thing with me. Many people think that my only biff with Bride of Chucky  is that it doesn't have Andy Barclay in it. And yes, I was disappointed that Barclay was not in the film, but there was more to it than that.  For one, I enjoyed the humor of the first three, and found the humor of Bride of Chucky to be more raunchy, cliched and what I like to call "junior high funny." I also didn't understand how the first couple of stories took place in Chicago, with Chucky's only way of getting out of the Good Guy Doll body was to perform the voodoo speech on the first person he revealed his true self to.....to now all of a sudden we're in New Jersey and he has to get an amulet that was never mentioned that he was buried with. Again continuity is a big thing with me.

If I separate Bride of Chucky from the other three films, I can sit down and enjoy it. I'll never find Jade or Jesse to be as interesting as Andy Barclay or even Nica Pierce, but they aren't as annoying and dull as I one time thought them as. I also find things about Bride of Chucky  that I really appreciate. For one, it was rewarding to get to see John Ritter in a role where he got to play a very unlikable antagonist. Being so used to seeing him as the "Heya Champ", "You bet sport" dad-like hero, it was fascinating to see him playing such an unlikable jerk.

Bride of Chucky led into Seed of Chucky which I couldn't even get all the way through. I was much happier to get Curse of Chucky which I thought was a pretty damn good sequel and I cannot wait until Cult of Chucky comes out! I haven't been this excited for a sequel in years!

7. Beverly Hills Cop 3

I love the first two Beverly Hills Cop movies but the third installment did not do it for me. While it has an interesting premise, it failed to execute. For one, the character of Axel Foley seems to be much different in this installment than he was in the previous two films. Whereas he was smooth, cool and collected in I and II, making calculated, intelligent moves, in III he is off the wall, crazy and borderline dumb at times. I'm not sure whether this falls on bad writing on the part of the screenwriter, bad direction from the director or on the shoulders of Eddie Murphy himself. The usually energetic and witty Murphy seemed tired and lackadaisical. Apathetic compared to how he had been the first two films.

I also found the character of Jon Flint (Hector Elizondo) to be dull and boring compared to that of Sgt. Taggart (John Ashton). I also feel that the film was not edited well because there are scenes that suggest and even imply that Flint is a dirty cop on the side of the criminals, and yet at the end he ends up being a good guy.

The first two films were fun, well written and well acted. This one....wasn't. I think Murphy feels the same way as does Judge Reinhold, that the third film wasn't good and the BHC series needs a better send off. Here's to Beverly Hills Cop IV, if it is ever made being the awesome thrill ride that I and II were and being as far away from III as possible.

6. Hannibal

I love Silence of the Lambs. I love Red Dragon too. I own both and I've sat down and watched both on several occasions. I saw Hannibal once and I don't care to ever see it again. Whereas the other two films in the series are mesmerizing, psychological thrillers this film seems nothing more than an attempt to gross out its audience.

Along with the disgusting factor, I also felt the film had Dr. Lector rely on luck and circumstance much more than he did his uncanny ability to outsmart like he did in the other two films. I didn't as much have a problem with Hannibal getting away as much as I did how he got away. In Silence of the Lambs, his escape is extraordinarily clever. In Red Dragon, even though it didn't work, his plan to upend Will Graham was still quite clever. In Hannibal, Clarice comes to his rescue and then in a scene that makes absolutely no sense whatsoever the butler pushes the disfigured man into the pig pen to be eaten alive. That scene alone, while not the only thing wrong with this movie, ruins it for me. There was no logical reason for him to do that. None whatsoever.

I do not like this film.

5. Superman IV: The Quest for Peace

A lot of people like to make the claim that Superman III is just as bad as IV, but it is not even comparable. IV is extremely bad. The story is bad. The acting is bad. The directing is bad. The special effects people should be drug out into the street and shot. This film lacks feeling, emotion, and any sense of life. Knock III till the cows come home if you wish, but at least it had some substance. I was thinking that the return of Gene Hackman as Lex Luthor would bring life back into the series, but it didn't. Whereas sidekick Otis was comic relief, Luthor's nephew Lenny (Jon Cryer) was annoying. Nuclear Man was painful to watch as well. The scene where Lacy is flown into space and she breathes and moves about normally bothered me too. Even III wouldn't have done anything that stupid.

Margot Kidder's and Mark McClure's involvement in the film comes off as obligated, rushed and insincere. The rekindling of Lois's and Clark's relationship was lit on a wick with no wax. It just wasn't there.

I pull this movie off the shelf every now and again to try and see if there is anything in it that can be its redeeming quality, its saving grace. Unfortunately all I see to do is find more wrong with it each time I watch it.

4. Bloodsport 2: The Next Kumite

 This film is bad. Bad.  How in the Hell there were two more sequels after this one, I don't know. The direct to video B films couldn't have made much, if any money. Bloodsport is certainly no masterpiece of a movie. The acting is pretty awful and the film can picked apart for its flaws, but compared to this rubbish, it is a damned work of art.

My biggest problem with Bloodsport 2: The Next Kumite is that they completely changed the character of Ray Jackson. Why!?!!? Donald Gibb returned for the role of Jackson, why would you make the character completely different in part two than he was in part 1? Why!!?!? WHY!?!?!?!?!?!?!? In part one he was a big, burly man with an outer tough man image and an interior of a good guy with a big heart and a genuine care for his friends. In part 2, he's just an asshole. Nothing likable about him at all and I don't get why they took what could have been the film's saving grace and ruined it.

3. Karate Kid III

This film really, really ticks me off. I mean REALLY ticks me off. I realize that Karate Kid II wasn't exactly Shakespeare but it at least made a decent attempt to follow up the gem that was The Karate Kid.  I called Halloween H20 a slap in the face to Donald Pleasence. Well this film, was a kick in the nuts to The Karate Kid and Karate Kid II. 

The main problem with this film is continuity. Mr. Miyagi had spent a significant amount of time working with Daniel, teaching him not only about Karate but about life. Preparing him physically and mentally, as well as emotionally for life's challenges in the first two films. We watched as Daniel grew and progressed from Miyagi's guidance. Now all of a sudden in III, Daniel has seemingly forgotten everything that Miyagi has taught him. He's regressed into a whiny, scared and helpless pathetic little punk. And there is no reason or explanation for it.

He gets off a plane after fighting an extremely skilled Chozen in a death match in Okinawa to suddenly be scared to death by local tournament champion Mike Barnes? He can put on a decent fight, even defeat Chozen, but he can't even get a single hit in on Mike Barnes? This completely undermines the entire story of part II.

I'm asked when complaining about this film if there is anything that could have been done to make me buy that Mike Barnes was that good of a fighter. The answer is yes, there could have been.  And the fact that nothing was done to give Barnes' some legitimacy, is another reason I hate this film. They could have shown Barnes winning junior World Championships or junior Olympic gold medals. I also think they could have shown Terry Silver training with Mike Barnes, going over everything to expect from Daniel. I would have appreciated a scene where Silver first instructs Daniel and then shows Mike Barnes everything he taught Daniel. Then in an encounter with Barnes, Daniel confesses to Terry Silver that he can't figure out why he can't get a hit in on Barnes. It's as if Barnes has an answer to every move Daniel tries. I would have appreciated something like that. Instead all we're left with is that Daniel, who was able to put up decent fights against two time All Valley champion Johnny Lawrence and Okinawan Karate expert Chosen, can't even get one hit on "bad boy" Mike Barnes.

I once read that the screenplay for Karate Kid III was actually written before the screenplay for Karate Kid II, and it was intended to be the original follow up to The Karate Kid. Producers felt that it was too similar to the original film, and they opted to go with what became Karate Kid II, instead. When it came time to make a third sequel, instead of writing a new script and having to shell out more money for it, they already had the rights to this script and they decided to go with it.

What a stupid decision. What a cheap, lazy and stupid decision. The characters Mr. Miyagi and Daniel Larusso deserved a better send off than this. Pat Morita and Ralph Macchio deserved a better send off than this.

I'll give the movie that it still had some tender moments between Morita and Macchio. Despite having nothing to work with in a shit-script, the two still had some great on screen chemistry. I felt bad for Robin Lively, who did her best in spite of what she had to work with.

This film had no excuses. There is no reason this sequel should be as bad as what it is. I do not blame any of the actors at all. They all did their part. It is the result of a cheap and lazy production and as you can tell, I'm not very forgiving of it.

2. A Nightmare on Elm Street 2 

Out of all of the Nightmare on Elm Street films this is the hardest one for me to sit through. Part 5 is also difficult too, but this one is a little worse. It lacks the scares, the laughs and the overall enjoyment that the original film had. The characters aren't at all interesting and the darker tone adds nothing to the film. If anything it takes away from it. I'm very surprised that another sequel was made after this film considering how bad it was. I'm glad it was though, because part 3 is my favorite out of all of the films.

1. Jaws The Revenge 

Oh God, where do I start? This isn't only the worst sequel ever made, it's one of the worst movies ever made. My condolences to anyone who has ever been able to make it all the way through this film. If you need a hug or to talk about the horrific experience it was for you, I am here for you. This was torture, pure torture.

A roaring shark? Need I say more? The way they killed the shark...need I say more?

How about the explanation behind Martin Brody's death. How he died of a heart attack, because "the fear of the shark killed him."  Yeah, that makes a lot of sense. Floating on a piece of wood, he shoots one shark as it is on its way to devour him and it explodes. Then in Jaws 2, he goes out on an air-tube and holds up a cable for the shark to bite and electrocute itself. He does that, but simply thinking about the shark, while he's on land terrifies him to death...literally.

And Lorraine Gary having flashbacks from events she wasn't there to see from the first film! Whose idea was this!!??! I'm told as a writer that my stuff isn't good enough to publish because of little minor mistakes! Who the Hell allowed this into the film!?!? Who!??! They should be drug out into the street and shot along with the Superman IV: The Quest for Peace special effects team.

I don't know if someone tried if they could make a sequel worse than this one.  I guess the original Texas Chainsaw Massacre as well as the remake both have pretty bad sequels too, but they weren't exactly spectacular films to begin with either.

THAT'S who that was!?!?!! (Six Pro Wrestlers Who Did a Great Job of Disguising Who They Were)

The key to a successful existence as a professional wrestler is to find a gimmick/character that works for you, gets over with the fans and makes both you and the companies you work for a lot of money. For some workers in the profession, they are able to make a single gimmick work for a long period of time, or even their entire career. Bret Hart, Ric Flair, Dusty Rhodes, Roddy Piper, Randy Savage the names go on and on. Wrestlers who had few or even one gimmick that they were able to draw money pretty much from day one until they retired.

Others, like Ed Leslie for example had a variety of gimmicks. They'd try one thing for a while and then switch over to another. And most of the time you knew it was them. Sure, Leslie had Brutus "The Barber" Beefcake, The Zodiac, The Booty Man, The Disciple, and a handful of others, but no matter what he did, you knew it was him. Kevin Nash was Oz, Vinnie Vegas and Diesel but it was always loud and clear that despite what name he went by, it was Kevin Nash in different clothes.

Yet every now and again a wrestler would change his gimmick so much that it wasn't obvious that it was him. It wasn't obvious who it was under the mask or behind the face paint. Wrestlers would lose weight, gain weight, lose muscle mass, gain muscle mass, grow or shave facial hair and you wouldn't know it was them.

During the long and illustrious life of professional wrestling only a few wrestlers have been able to pull this off. Let's have a look at who they were.

6. Al Snow was Avatar 

I'm not the only professional wrestling fan who was surprised to learn that the guy under the mask of Avatar was Al Snow. His mannerisms, the way he carried himself and his techniques in the ring were way different than how he performed as Al Snow. He did moves as Avatar that he never did as Al Snow or as Leif Cassidy. He walked differently and even hit the ropes differently. For years I thought that Avatar was either a Mexican or Japanese wrestler that tested the waters of the WWE for a while before going back to Mexico or Japan. I was quite shocked when I found out that it was Al Snow.

5. Justin Credible was Aldo Montoya 

I guess what threw me off about Justin Credible and Aldo Montoya being the same person was that the two characters were so much different from one another. Credible, closer to the real life P.J. Palaco, was a cocky, full of himself, arrogant, know it all. The type that the older more conservative generation would refer to as a punk or a degenerate. Whereas Montoya was a modest, do the right thing, humble and heroic figure. A shaved head and a leaner body also helped Palaco to shed the jobber gimmick of the man known as "The Portuguese Man of War" for the more suiting hardcore personality of Credible.

4. Doink was Big Josh 

There was no internet back in 1993. Wrestling fans couldn't go into the computer room and quickly look up who it was dressed up as an evil clown gracing the rings of the WWE. We could do nothing but look and speculate as to who it might be. For many fans, including myself, finding out that it was actually Matt Osborne who we had previously known as Maniac Matt Borne and Big Josh, was quite shocking. He had lost a lot of bulk and wasn't nearly as chiseled as he had been earlier in his career. The fact that he was able to fool so many people and pull off the character as well as he did was a true testimony to how great of a performer Borne was.

3. Earthquake later became Golga 

The former HWT wrestler at Louisiana State University, John Tenta had a successful stint in the WWE as the Canadian Earthquake from 1989 to 1993, helping to make the company a success both as a challenger to Hulk Hogan and as one half of the powerful tag team of The Natural Disasters along with partner Typhoon. After he left and came back in 1998, he was hoping to rekindle the Earthquake gimmick. Vince McMahon had another vision. To him Earthquake was yesterday and wouldn't work in the new Attitude Era of WWE. As a result, the now smaller Earthquake, who had lost a significant amount of weight was repackaged as the carefree, lovable and fun Golga. Although along with fellow teammates as a member of the Oddities, the gimmick was short lived, it did get over with the fans and Tenta did seem to enjoy himself. Few knew at the time that Golga was Earthquake under a mask and many were surprised to find out years later.

2. Dustin Rhodes and Goldust are the same person 

Now it's common knowledge. Everyone knows this. They didn't 22 years ago. As far as WCW went, in the early 90's I was a Natural Dustin Rhodes fan. I was very into his feud with Ravishing Rick Rude and upon his departure, often wondered what had happened to him. I figured at the time that he had either given up the professional wrestling business for a different life or he had gone to perform in Japan. When Goldust appeared on WWE television, it never occurred to me for a moment that it was Dustin Rhodes in gold face paint, a gold wig and a gold jumpsuit. When THE WRESTLER magazine did an article on how Goldust was actually Dustin Rhodes, I couldn't believe it. This androgynous, metro-sexual, creepy, perverted, over sensual and sexual character with the deep, slow soothing voice was the redneck, southern cowboy with the fast Texas twang from only a few years prior? It still impresses me to this day not only that Rhodes was able to pull off the Goldust gimmick but how incredibly impeccable he was at doing it.

1. Smash became The Repo Man 

Growing up I was a huge Demolition mark. Even when they turned evil, I was still into them. When Ax left and Crush permanently took his place the magic was gone, but I was still a fan. When the team broke up, I often wondered what became of them. Soon after Crush turned back up with the same name but a completely different character. Gone was the face paint and the Demolition getup and he was now in a bright Orange, Yellow and Purple singlet that resembled the popular soda of the same name. Little did I know, as I continued to wonder what happened to Smash, that this new Repo Man character was the same guy. He had lost weight, shaved his head and grown a goatee. While he did keep a few of the same mannerisms, he did a great job of disguising his voice to make him sound completely different than his Demolition character of Smash. 

The Sentence

Why did I do it? Why did I take the risk? I've served seven years of a ten year sentence. I only had three to go. Why did I try and escape? Everyone keeps asking the questions. I even keep asking the questions.

Maybe it's because I don't belong here. Maybe it's because I didn't do anything wrong. Maybe that's why. Maybe it's because I sat in a cell, doing hard time day in and day out for the past seven years, being punished for something I didn't even do. Maybe that's why I did it. Maybe that's why I took the risk.

You see, Leigh, he's the one that should be in here. He's the one that should be doing the shit jobs, eating the shit food, sleeping on the shit cot every night. You see Leigh's the one that done wrong. You see Leigh's the dealer, the racketeer, the criminal. Not sure if you see that or not. What you do see, is you see Leigh in his new Lamborghini, partying it up with the guys, a hot broad on each arm.

I did my best to block it all out of my head. Tell myself as unfair as it is, that I was doing the wrap for what he did, and that's just the way it is. I even convinced myself that it wasn't all that bad. At least they still let me have my books, my paper and my pen. They still let me lift weights every day too. Now I don't even get that.

That con Glen. That son of a bitch. He let me taste freedom. If only from his description, I couldn't help myself. He reminded me of what freedom was. What freedom looked like. I knew we could get caught. I knew that it could happen. Woody and Penny knew too. And how could we have been so stupid? We smelled Glen for the Rat he was from the beginning, but I suppose we all wanted freedom so bad that we ignored the 99% chance that he was going to screw us and latched on to the 1% that his plan might work.

We got out, just like he said we would. Then we took one car and he took another.

"Turn left at McGillis."

It was always the plan. Turn left at McGillis, follow the old stump road to the clearing and we'd head south on the river.

We turned left at McGillis all right. We turned left and Glen turned right. Right into freedom as the three of us met a brigade of  cops.

Now I sit in pitch dark, solitary confinement. No books, no paper, no pen. Joey, the guard says that it'll be at least another three months before I'm allowed back into the yard to lift weights.

I had three years left. Three years. Now, I don't know much longer.

Reid lets us all know as often as he can, that there is a way out. All we gotta do is be a part of one of his experiments for one year and then we're free. Not only are we free, but we get outta here with a lump of dough and if we want job placement.  Sounds good don't it? Like you ain't got nothing to lose?

Yeah, Reid will say that. He'll talk all about the two guys who went through the experiment, came out and are now doing great.

"Erased two years off his sentence!" He'll brag. "The other four!"

Yeah, Reid likes to mention those two. It's the other eight out of ten this past year that he doesn't say much about. The four who died in his experiment. The two who got of out of the pen and are now living the rest of their lives in the loony bin up in Valley Pleasant. The one who's now free, as much as a paraplegic can be free. The one, well no one knows what happened to him.

If I knew that Reid's experiment would kill me, I'd go ahead and do it. I don't fear death. Death is no enemy of mine. Yet to know that life might get worse than this? No, I didn't do nothing for it to be as bad as it is. I don't deserve this. I sure as Hell ain't gonna except worse.

"It's your own damn fault you're still here." Reid can keep on preaching. "You'd be out in a year, if you'd only have the courage to endure one of my experiments."

Leigh's living the high life. Glen's on the run. The list of people who want to kill him is long, but not as long as the list of people who'd rather see him alive and to suffer. That piece of shit isn't good enough for death. He doesn't deserve that peace.

But I do. At this point all I want back is my books, my paper and my pen. To be allowed in the yard to lift weights again. I want more. I deserve better. Maybe I'm not owed a damn thing, but if that is the case, I wasn't owed the shitty hand I was dealt. I did nothing to deserve to be here.  Yet here I sit, in solitary confinement. Pitch dark blackness, I don't know anymore if you are my enemy or my friend.

Light, I've been asking for you to shine upon me for so long and yet you refuse. Not sure if I want you anymore or not. I plead, I pray, I beg....and yet things only get darker.

I'm going to sleep now. I'm sure I'll wake. Not sure I'll want to but I know I will wake. Not sure life if I want you to end or if what I really want you to finally do is begin. I doubt you'll do either. I won't die nor will I escape.

Spring and Summer Workout Plan

WEEK ONE 

MONDAY - CHEST 
Bench Press - 4 Sets (12-10-8-6)
Inclined Bench Press - 4 sets (12-10-8-6)
Declined Bench Press - 4 sets (12-10-8-6)
Chest Press - 4 sets (12-10-8-6)
Cable Flys - 4 Sets (12-10-8-6)

1 hour walk while reading.

Run or Walk the Dog @ Night

TUESDAY - BICEPS/ABS 
Barbell Curls - 4 Sets (15-12-10-8)
Decline Sit-ups (Till Failure x 4)
Olympic Preacher Curls (15-12-10-8)
Rope Resistance Crunches (Till Failure x 4)
Cable Curls (15-12-10-8)
Wheel Extensions (Till Failure x 4)

1 hour walk while reading

Run or Walk the Dog @ Night

WEDNESDAY - Full Cardio Day
20 minute jog on treadmill
20 minute on Elliptical machine
20 Minute on Exercise bike
30 Minute walk while reading

1 hour walk while reading

Run or Walk the Dog @ Night

THURSDAY - SHOULDERS/TRICEPS 
Gorilla Press -  4 Sets (12-10-8-6)
French Press - 4 Sets (12-10-8-6)
Skull Crushers - 4 Sets (12-10-8-6)
Overhead Triceps Cable Extensions (12-10-8-6)
Machine Gorilla Press - 4 Sets (12-10-8-6)

1 hour walk while reading

Run or Walk the Dog @ Night

FRIDAY - BACK
Upright Rows - 4 sets (15-12-10-8)
Lat Pulls - 4 Sets (15-12-10-8)
The "things" - 4 Sets (15-12-10-8)
Lat Rows - 4 Sets (15-12-10-8)

1 hour walk while reading

Run or Walk the Dog @ Night 

                              WEEK TWO

MONDAY - CHEST 
Dumbbell Press - 4 sets (15-12-10-8)
Dumbbell Incline Press - 4 Sets (15-12-10-8)
Dumbbell Flys - 4 sets (15-12-10-8)
Machine Press - 4 Sets (15-12-10-8)
Machine Flys - 4 Sets (15-12-10-8)

1 hour walk while reading

Run or Walk the Dog @ Night 

TUESDAY - BICEPS and ABS 
Twist Curls - 4 Sets (20-15-12-10)
Decline Situps - 4 Sets till Failure
Preacher Curls - 4 Sets (20-15-12-10)
Rope Resistant Crunches - 4 Sets till Failure
Hammer Curls - 4 Sets (20-15-12-10)
Leg Lifts - 4 Sets till Failure

1 hour walk while reading

Run or Walk the Dog @ Night

WEDNESDAY - Full Cardio Day
20 Minute Jog on Treadmill
20 Minute on Elliptical machine
20 Minute on Exercise Bike
30 Minute Walk on Treadmill while reading

Run or Walk the Dog @ Night

THURSDAY - SHOULDERS/TRICEPS
Military Press 4 sets (12-10-8-6)
Skull Crushers 4 sets (12-10-8-6)
Triceps Machine Pushouts  4 Sets (12-10-8-6)
Triceps Extensions 4 sets  (12-10-8-6)

Dips 4 sets till failure

1 hour walk while reading

Run or Walk the Dog @ Night

FRIDAY - BACK 
Lateral Raises 4 Sets (15-12-10-8)
Rocky's 4 Sets (15-12-10-8)
Bent Rows 4 sets (15-12-10-8)
Headstand Pushups 4 sets till Failure
Reverse Situps 4 sets till Failure

1 hour walk while reading

Run or Walk the Dog @ Night 

The Sigourney Savages 2001-2004

Call it curiosity or call it boredom, I don't know.  A guy on one of the amateur wrestling facebook pages I follow was bragging about how great his school was at sports during his time in high school. It made me wonder how good Sigourney was over all in sports during my time in high school.

You'd think I'd already know, but I was very much in my own world back in those days. (Not that anything has changed.) Football was God at my school so I do remember we were always good at that, and I remember that the girl's softball team was pretty good too. Sigourney at that time was definitely NOT a basketball school. You'd think I'd remember how we did as a wrestling team, but other than senior year, I don't know!

So I grabbed a yearbook.  Here is Sigourney Sports my Freshman through Senior year.


FRESHMAN YEAR: 2001 
Baseball = 4-11 record

Softball = 21-7 record Conference and District Champions. Sub-state Qualifier.

Football = 9-3 record. State Semi-Finals.

Volleyball = No information

Cross Country = No information

Girls Basketball = 8-13 record

Boy's Basketball = 2-18 record

Wrestling = Two State Qualifiers Adam Graham @ 125 lbs and Dan Hammes @ 152 lbs. Both went 1-2 at State.

Boy's Track = Lucas Meier was a District Champion and State Qualifier in the 1 mile run. Dan Hammes, Wil Hanchet, Pat Flynn and Nick Baker Qualified for and competed in the Drake Relays.

Girl's Track = No information

Boys and Girls Golf = No information

SOPHOMORE YEAR: 2002 
Baseball = 13-6 record  Nick Baker and Ryne Christner named to All Conference.  Lucas Meier named to All District.

Softball = 34-5 Record. Conference and District Champions. 4th Place State finish.

Cross Country = No information

Football = 13-0 Record. State Champions.

Volleyball = 3-8 record

Girl's Basketball = 6-15 record

Boy's Basketball = 1-17 record

Wrestling = Six District Qualifiers Steve Seeley @ 112 lbs, Jarrod Thompson @ 119 lbs, Adam Graham @ 125 lbs, Tyler Rash @ 140 lbs, Dan Hammes @ 152 lbs, and Darren Miller @ 160 lbs. Graham, Hammes and Miller all qualified for State with Graham finishing one match shy of placing and Hammes and Miller both finishing in 6th.

Girl's Track = No information

Boy's Track = The 4X4 team of Nick Baker, Wil Hanchet, Dan Hammes and Keith McLaughlin qualified for both the Drake Relays and the State tournament.

Boys and Girl's Golf = No information

JUNIOR YEAR: 2003 
Football = 8-2 record

Volleyball = 5-8 record

Boy's Basketball = 8-12 record

Girl's Basketball = 0-20 record

Wrestling = Four District Qualifiers Steve Seeley @ 119 lbs, Dan Hammes @ 160 lbs, Darren Miller @ 189 lbs, Jeremy Webb @ 215 lbs.  Hammes and Miller qualified for State with Hammes finishing in 4th place and Miller in 8th.

Boy's Track = No information

Girl's Track = No information

Boy's and Girl's Golf = No information

Baseball = 12-7 record.  Nick Baker and Ryne Christner named to All Conference.

Softball = No information

SENIOR YEAR: 2004 
Football = 8-3 record

Volleyball = 8-5 record

Boy's Basketball = 8-14 record

Girl's Basketball = No information

Wrestling = 18-4 dual meet record. Two district Qualifiers Jon McLaughlin @ 215 lbs and Jeremy Webb @ HWT. Both qualified for State.  Had 5 wrestlers finish third at sectionals, one match shy of qualifying for districts.

Boy's Track = No information

Girl's Track = Amy Dobbins was a District champion and State Qualifier in some event. Not sure what.  Year book doesn't say, but I swear Kristine Ballensky did something of significance too. Conference champion or something.

Softball = No information

Baseball = 13-11 record

Boy's and Girl's Golf = No information



So make of it what you will. I'd say overall Sigourney's sports during that time were football and softball. That's where we had the most success. Wrestling and baseball were solid, and competitive in the conference. Track, both boys and girls had some highlights.